Monday, September 8

Honestly, baby...

There are times when I wonder if my contest sponsors can read my mind.

Take, for example, the berrie sweet T-shirt that Mom 4 Life sent over to me recently.

"Not sleeping through the night."

It's perfect. And I may have to buy one of these Honest Baby shirts in every size they have until Buttercup decides to stop tormenting me and her father with three a.m. wake-up calls.

But this isn't the only gem Jill has at her shop to help you and your baby tell the world to back-off in a "funny, funny, ha, ha?" kind-of-way.

Tired of getting "the stink eye" from your stay-at-home neighbor through her kitchen window as you and your kids rush out the door five minutes late for daycare (and work) again? Then the "Working moms rock" is all about you.

Are ya ready to clock the next mom at playgroup who gives you crap about your still crawling 13-month old? (Because trust us, we all know that Suzie was walking at 9 months. Can we please just move on?) I'll bet that no one will say a word if you show up next week with Junior sportin' his new "I'll walk when I'm good and ready" tee.

And there's more. With the perfect pint-sized comeback for most "Mommy needs a martini" moments, it's really a great way to light-heartedly address some annoying situations. They are also just plain hilarious.

Honest Baby T-shirts run in size from newborn to six years. Prices vary, depending on if you want long or short-sleeves and if you want the plain or thought-bubble patched saying, but you can use Buttercup's $28 shirt as a good reference. (And yes, this is definitely one instance where I'd gladly pay up for a cute and quippy baby shirt!)

And Jill? May I suggest a few more? How about "Happily attached?" for us baby-wearing mammas? Or "What crib?" for Buttercup and her co-sleeping baby friends? Or there's always the classic "Fluffy butts are eco-friendly" tees for the cloth-diapered set. I have more. In case you haven't noticed, I'm plenty full of snappy comebacks!

And now, for the real reason you are all still reading this post (even though I let myself believe it's my mad writing skillz that keep you coming back), yes, we have a contest! But hold on to your hats, people, because this one is going to be just a little bit different.

If you'd like to win an Honest Baby tee in the size and design of your choice, all you have to do is tell me (and Jill from Honest Baby) which available saying has "you" written all over it and why! And we want details!

One winner will be personally selected by Jill, so creativity and brutal honesty are major components here. No extra entries. No random drawings. Are ya up to the challenge?


Entries will be accepted in the form of a comment to this post until midnight (EST) on Sept. 15. And make sure your email address is included in your comment if you want your entry to count. As always, the winner must contact me within four days of the announcement date or a runner-up will be selected.

And there you have it.

Now I'm off to co-sleep with my attached, cloth-diapered 15-month-old who, coincidentally, only sleeps through the night when she is snuggled safely between me and her daddy. Got a T-shirt for that?

82 comments:

ezmerelda said...

"Don't expect a lot. I'm big for my age." Babies in my family are always a littler larger than normal when they are born, so this would be perfect!

ezmerelda@mail.com

Sandy said...

well the one three that seem to be more toward us lately is the not sleeping thru the night and not a performing monkey and the last working moms rock. Lets just put it this way, she doesn't sleep until she is exhausted, doc says its a stage and she will not cry but instead lay there, nothing is wrong with her..she is like mom and dad and siblings- when she is tired she will collapse in bed, so for now. Yes, she gets exercise and play and wears me out watching her, she just will go for a long time without sleep- like she is missing something important. SOmetimes we can get her to fall asleep watching a show-dvd and she will snooze for 20 minutes - hour but then she is energized so those naps kill us more, but we have enough adults to watch and play. Why don't adults have that brain function to be totally refreshed after a nap and wake up all happy and peppy? Truly, and this one is not a baby she just is full of energy..nope not alot of sugar, we watch her diet....and the other saying about the monkey- well she pulls the blanket out or hides behind things when people look at her too much, like look at something else. The working moms is more for those who are irritated I choose to go out and work part time instead of sitting with the babies 24/7- we all need our away time

dolls123 said...

I like the "don't expect alot, i'm big for my age" design because both my kids were always mistaken for being older than they were.

luckydolls123[at]verizon[dot]net

Jenn S. said...

I like the "10th percentile but still growing tee". My little guy is so tiny.

Lori said...

Working moms rock!

danosor said...

I like Happily Attached.

Alicia Webster said...

"I Only Eat Carbs" Orange Patch on Olive Tee in size 4T...We are a Vegan family, and although we do actually consume proteins through beans, legumes, etc., we are obviously more carb-oriented than a meat-eating family would be. I am asking for the 4T so that in the spirit of hand-me-downs, all three of my kids will get a chance to wear it.Both slogans and color choices are fabulous.
Alicia Webster
5webs@comcast.net

Becca said...

"10th percentile but still growing" is the tee that fits my daughter best. She was five and a half pounds when she was born, and she's been trying to catch up ever since. At 18 months she's a great eater, but has a fast metabolism and is always on the move. People have always been amazed at what she can do (crawl, wave, say "hi", walk) because she looks younger than she is due to her size. This tee would serve as an explanation for surprised strangers.
beccachristensen at hotmail dot com

Kristie said...

I love "I only eat carbs" and "Sharing is over-rated". They both remind me mostly of my 2 year old (though my 1 year old is now leaning toward only wanting carbs.) My 2 year old daughter will only eat cereal in the morning and loves to snack on crackers at any time. Then at meals I can only get her to eat sandwiches and pasta.
She also hates sharing with her younger brother. She has a hard time mostly because he gets right into whatever she's doing and he doesn't understand sharing. It makes it hard on her.

kygirl said...

I like the I'm not a performing monkey. Just because everyone sits around and stares at little babies, lol

Linda said...

LOL My daughter & now granddaughter are nicknamed Monkey - "I am not a performing Monkey" is perfect! Been trying to teach Alexxa her animal/names sounds & get it on video - she has her animal sounds/names down, but it is another story to record it for her Mom!

valmg said...

I like the "working moms rock" tee because I am a working mom.

reb said...

I like the i'll walk when im ready one.

rebbi511 at peoplepc.com

mverno said...

i'm not a performing monkey

jenny said...

wow how cute i be happy to have any one honest i dont have a fav and i cant just pick one so well if i'm picked to win this then i pick it out thanks

Linda said...

The "don't expect a lot, I'm bit for my age" shirt. My baby's a big girl - 95th percentile for both height and weight

Annie said...

Firstly, your daughter is absolutely too gorgeous!

I would choose "I'm not a performing monkey..." lol because people always expect wee ones to "perform" a certain way, say hello etc.

Thanks

nancyrobster@gmail.com

blueviolet said...

The one I like is "I'm not a performing monkey" because I can't tell you how many times I've attempted to hold a theatrical presentation and my star actor is a no-show. It's not fair but hey, like the shirt says, he ain't no performing monkey!
doot65{at}comcast[dot]net
Elizabeth

grenee143 said...

If I could choose. I would choose a combo of " Don't expect a lot. I'm big for my age." and " 10th percentile but still growing." Every time by daughter now 9 months old goes to her well-baby checkups, she is in the 80-90 percentiles for height & weight and the 5 percentiles for head size. My baby has a small head with a huge baby body. Its all good she'll grow into it (hopefully?!)

Millie said...

Hands down I love the I'm not a performing monkey..." because people are always trying to show off their children like they are performers.. my sister is always saying "watch this ... its soo cute... just one more minute... I swear she does it when no one is looking" ;) lol classic

stacitk@yahoo.comBa said...

Back of I'm teething is perfect for us right now!

Gianna said...

I love the fold and go doll house.. my daughter adores dollhouses :)

Natasha said...

Do I have to pick just one??!? Lol, so many apply (and I'm pretty sure that's not a good thing)!! First I would choose "Don't expect a lot, I'm big for my age" because my little (okay, not so little) man came into this world at 9lbs, 9oz - ouch, right? - and has been growing like a weed ever since! His daddy saw a little girl his height/size walking, and asked why he's not...the little girl was 1...my little man was 4 mos old (he's a first time daddy, so I cut him some slack). I hope the sizing on that one is on the generous side, lol.
"Not sleeping through the night" would be my second pick, as my little man has decided sleep is not for him. He's found other hobbies he enjoys more...like attempted breakouts from his crib, dismantling his mobile (yes, I know, that one's my fault, but I swear he couldn't get at it the night before - and he wasn't 5 mos yet...), or just general screaming is better suited to his style. Then, when sleep finally wins the battle - and trust me, it's always hard fought - he wakes for only reasons of the utmost important, like say, his suckie falls out, or somewhere down the block someone closes a car door - the sort of things that are obviously in dire need of attention!!
Well, I could go on, but I can only chuckle at his antics for so long before I need another cup of coffee to make me feel better...did I mention he's not a good sleeper??!?

natasha_sacopaso[at]hotmail[dot]com

Kelli said...

Adorable! I love the '10th percentile but still growing' t-shirt. My son was 5 pounds at birth and at 15 months is still not on "the charts" ... it would be nice to have a cute way to remind family to just be patient .. he's not going to be 2 feet tall forever! :)

pckrfan at gmail.com

rosannepm said...

I only eat carbs-just like her mother
rosans4@comcast.net

littlelatina said...

I'm not a performing monkey!

vboackle said...

working moms rock because i do both.

tatertot374 said...

Thank you for having this! These are just fantastic! I love the "Dont't expect a lot. Im Big for my age" My 2 year old daughter is really tall for her age so this would be perfect for her. This fits my oldest 2 children as well but my 2 year old is a spunky little thing and this fits her peronallity to a T. Thank you!
tatertot374@sbcglobal.net

MassFoodie said...

Working Moms Rock - in heather grey / pink patch size 4T

sandra jensen said...

I love I'm not a performing monkey! These are such cute saying!

sajdakota@yahoo.com

sandra jensen

Casey H said...

Im in love with the "dont expect a lot, I'm big for my age." It would be perfect for either one of my kids. My daughter is 4 and in the 95th percentile... my son is 3 weeks old and a lady guessed yesterday that he was 6 weeks old. I cant help it. My husband is 6'6" and must have rubbed off on the kiddos. Theres no debating whether these were the milkman's kids!!LOL!
num1twinkie at yahoo dot com

Laura said...

"Don't expect a lot. I'm big for my age." would be perfect for my newest nephew!

trinitygsd at yahoo dot com

kristilb19 said...

Back off, I'm teething! CUTE! I'm due soon and would love to win!
kristilb19@yahoo.com

kdkdkd said...

"Sharing is Over-rated" would be perfect for my son. I know that is exactly how he feels since his little brother came along.

justicecw said...

I LOVE the working moms rock tee shirt. It would be perfect for my son. He just started school and sometimes I feel bad that I am not there to drop him off and pick him up so this shirt is perfect for us. Thanks for making them in big kid sizes too! thanks, justicecw@hotmail.com

Heather said...

I love "back off I'm teething"!

Anonymous said...

I'm not a performing monkey-it's really great

Abby said...

I'll walk when I'm ready

Woo hoo you go girl! Love it!

ajcmeyer AT go DOT com

K said...

Okay, all of these are hilarious. It's funny to me how all of them would have worked for my three at different stages (my kids are now 5, 5 and 4 years old).

But the one I love is, "don't expect a lot, i'm big for my age." This one would be perfect for my surrogate son. He is six months old now and my friends (his parents) tell me how he's so big for his age and people always comment on his size! I knew the child felt big even when he was on the outside of my body. ;)

Thank you!!

alison23 at comcast dot net

Kari said...

Happily Attached - yes, most definitely. Perfect!

valerie2350 said...

Happily attached - just the way a baby should be! :)

Professional Mommy said...

Don’t expect a lot, I’m big for my age is the tee I NEED. My barely 2 year old is above the 95th percentile in weight and height and everyone thinks she's like a 4 year old!!!!

Teresa said...

I would say, I'll Walk When I'm Good and Ready, because my youngest has low muscle tone so she didn't learn to walk until she was two. Let me tell you, it got sooooo annoying when people kept asking "So when is she gonna start walking?"! Thanks!

phogle said...

Not sleeping through the night is my favorite. In a boy 24 months

Jennifer Carden said...

I want another baby just to be able to get the shirts!

madangle said...

The I am not a performing Monkey is my favorite, at my family reunions it's like a circus with all the cousins showing off their little ones talents

Nancy Sabina said...

Two weeks ago I would definitely have chosen "I'll walk when I'm good and ready" for my 16 month old. That's right - 16 months. But two weeks ago he up and started walking like he'd been doing it for years. So I guess we're good there. Now...about the talking. I've had a "baby" for about two and a half years now since my boys are just 13 months apart. I'm getting a little tired of the "uh uh uh" with an increasing sense of urgency thing while pointing. I would like some nice polite children who say "Mommy, I'm thirsty. May I please have a drink of milk?" But that's not what I've got. Yet. (*evil laughing*) So I really think the "I heard Einstein was a late talker" tee would be great for either of my boys. Do you think it would motivate them to START talking? You know...the whole if I buy them a tee that says something pithy like that then Murphy says they'll grow out of that phase before you can ship it to me? Maybe I should just order one to be sure.

layla said...

I love these shirts! The one that is most appropriate for my daughter who just turned 1 in August is "10th percentile but still growing". She is actually in the 10th percentile for weight and the 5th percentile for height. She is just small and has short little legs. She's been walking unassisted since she was almost 11 months old and it looks crazy because she is so small. When people see her walking they often say things like "She's so little, she can't be walking". Yeah, well tell that to her because she's all over the place. Hey, Jill, can you make a shirt that says "I heard you, I just don't care" for my 5 year old son?
laylarenee[at]cfl.rr.com

Ashley said...

The "I'm Not a Performing Monkey" saying is so true because while our toddler is capable of doing many cute things, he doesn't like doing them on command.

Think about it said...

I Love the "working moms rock" tee because I am a working mommie

Yasmine said...

Each saying had me smiling as i read them. But the one i can relate to the most is "BACK OFF I'M TEETHING"
I have twins i have been dealing with teething non-stop since they were 5 months! They dont give me a break. My sons tooth will be almost cut through, when my daughters starts teething, too! Im not sure what is better, them teething together-or one teething after the other?! As if i have a choice- im doomed either way!
Right now my daughters eye teeth are coming in(which is the worst EVER) and one of my sons back teeth is starting to cut through the gums!
As soon as i read this saying i knew this was sooo for me!
The "Sharing Is Over-rated" is a good one too, since they cant seem to share anything.
Too bad for them, if i am picked, they will have to share this T-shirt whether they like it or not!! =] thanks for the giveaway

Yasmineo142 at hotmail dot com

Janine said...

Well since my little one is in the 95% percentile for hieght, I like the -Don't expect much, I'm big for my age- shirt. Thanks so much!

janeener@gmail.com

Linda said...

Don't Expect A LOT is adorable!

paula h said...

10th Percentile But Still Growing. My son had severe GERD/ Acid Reflux. Because of this, he was slow to grow. Thanks to some wonderful doctors, he is now doing much better but is still smaller than the other kids his age. I get tired of people commenting on how small he is. I mean, really, do you think I don't know? The doctors said not to worry that now that he's gaining weight that he will catch up soon enough.

judybrittle said...

I love the Back Off...I'm Teething.

klp1965 said...

shaRING is overated..i am always telling mine to share but it seems like and endless battle :(

kywildcats_10 said...

I think my daughter would like working moms rock for her new baby because thats what she does.

Itchin To Scrap! said...

"colicky but cute"

Everywhere I go my daughter is oggled at and complimented (recent photo http://i109.photobucket.com/albums/n73/Nicca619/Picture0001.jpg ). I laugh and tell them shes great till the sun goes down then she cries and wants to nurse ALL NIGHT LONG. People dont seem to understand how a baby so cute could cause so many problems. My makeup must be covering my dark under eye circles well.

newmom8404 said...

Sharing is Over rated is just what my 17-month-old thinks.

pitaharmon said...

That site is fun and easy to click around. SHARING IS OVER-RATED is the perfect shirt for my 3 yr. old daughter. She even takes dog toys away from the puppy.....:(

Erma said...

We have moved 4 times in my life. Thanks
erma.hurtt@sbcglobal.net

AmandaSue said...

I like the "Sharing is Over-rated" I'd give it to my niece since she is a spoiled only child who never shares

Tipper said...

I'll walk when I'm ready. (It bugs me when people ask me why she's not doing all the things that others her age are doing. Stop comparing my baby to yours.)

Christine said...

Sharing is Overrated works for my daughter. She does not love having to share stuff with her older brother.

yellowlabs said...

Working moms rock!

InMyHeart01 said...

I can't decide between i am not a performing monkey and working moms rock,soi'd probably get both lol. because i'll have to work and i sometimes say that when ppl want my nephew to do things right that second.

calgirl said...

Sweet Cheeks Onesie is like me .

bison61 said...

Sharing is over-rated, for sure. the oldest is having a hard time. the younger two want everything he is playing with

tiramisu392 (at) yahoo.com

amyinkamloops said...

"Back off I am teething." This has to be the funniest and best one for me. I love it.

Thanks for hte great blog!

Jolene said...

I am not a performing monkey is wicked cute!

sharon said...

I like "i only eat carbs," our daughter, newly adopted from China, definitely fits this to a tee...
cute stuff

Anonymous said...

10th percentile and still growing for my little sweetie.
Angie K tisaynababaeatyahoo.com

KLM39 said...

ROFL!!! I love "Back off I'm teething" and "I'll walk when I'm good and ready"!!

carissaad said...

I would choose "Don't expect a lot, I'm big for my age" for my cousin's daughter. She will be three next Monday, but she looks like she's at least five.

Thanks!

carissaad at aol dot com

Jean said...

These are all hilarious--I particularly like "Back off, I'm teething!"

Misty said...

It's hard to pick just one. My 5 month old was sleeping through the night, but has decided she likes to come to Mommy and Daddy's bed about 1 am. OK, maybe she just decided she needs to be awake and we decided it is easier to get sleep when we put her between us! So the "Don't sleep though the night" one describes us best.

Misty

Misty said...

oops forgot to leave an email with my post.

twirler1979 at gmail dot com

Lisa said...

The Back off i'm teething and I'll walk when i'm ready tees are so cute. Thanks for the entry. angel_2417@yahoo.com

bonobo said...

I love the 10th percentile but still growing tee. My daughter was born at 32 weeks weighing under 3 lbs, her twin brother weight a little more. They are 15 months now and doing great, no health problems or developmental delays, but my daughter is still small and EVERYONE comments on it. She was about 6th percentile when we went to their 1 year appointment.

bndraldy said...

I LOVE the working moms rock tee shirt. Thanks for the opportunity to win!

maggie0352 said...

Not Sleeping through the night. Definitely me! maggie0352@aol.com

masonsgranny59 said...

"working moms rock"